She doesn't take pride in any of my accomplishments and in fact thinks she could do much better (she never worked - I had a very successful sales career - but she will make serious as a heart attack statements like "I could have been a CEO". I broke down inside. I do not blame her but it helps me to unravel the things that can not be balanced by medication. I asked if i can redo my room and she starts getting mad at me. It has always excited and entertained her, to think that I might be deathly ill. She still gets excited at the prospect that I might have something. Please write a book and sell it on Amazon KDP. This time around, she sent a copy of her hate letter to her sister, my aunt, presumably because my aunt and I have grown close over the past several years, and my mother must have thought that she could make my aunt hate me, too, with her hateful letter. She did this, with NO PROVOCATION, either time. It's like she has anger issues. Wouldn't she have died too? They interpret this question as how are your grades. If I dont wear the shoes she wanted me to wear, i get a lecture and maybe a grounding for a day. This seems so odd because so many of us would love if our partners asked how our day was and then actually tuned in and listened to the answer. I learned during my childhood how to make a narcissist putty in my hands. You know what's almost as sick as what I described? I went to school every day, exhausted from all the sleepless nights, and worried that while I was gone my mother might snap and kill my 4 pre-school siblings... (I was the eldest by 7+ years). We might feel like a puppet our whole life, but she always says that she is the real victim, while trampling everything you hold dear. Note: All of these questions relate to narcissistic traits. That's the thing, she even thinks she's doing right and never regrets a thing. You sound like a good person that cares enough about what she wants to be able to describe in the detail you did. I love my mom. The response I got back from my dad started a firestorm - I am sure she ripped him a new "one" - and since he has no gonads left after 60 years with her, called me to say that I was disrespectful and that I had to make it right, threatening not to go on a family trip for his birthday that all of us sibs had paid for and were planning on attending, so it would ruin things for the entire family and she could blame me! Well, guilt does weird things to folks...some get over it, some channel/redirect the guilt into anger and direct the anger at the (still-quite-alive) 2½ year old "cause" of the guilt...ME! My aunt was appalled by the letter. Something tells me your mom is under a lot of stress. My mom only gets really mad at me if I dont do what she wants. So I have given up. It's true, mother will give you her love and in return it will destroy yours, all in good faith. The Little Things That Can Take Over in Borderline Disorder . Not too long ago, after I tried to get her to stop gossiping about my sister (who she would readily call up and talk about me to!) My dad gets angry over such little things Right then, I'm 20 years old I've just come back home from my first year at uni and my dad seems to get really annoyed by little things. People don't like to believe that a mother would try to kill all her children, even though, sadly, horribly, you see these stories on the news all too often. I didn't like the feeling that she was making me her little b#tch by saying whatever she wanted,when she wanted, because I couldn't react. then i remembered. It reminds me of my mom picking arguments over nothing. I have four kids and they ARE lazy and proud of it. How do O make her less irritated with me? She can make us feel like we are living her life nto ours, Putting herself always on the center and being so loud when talking that all you hear throughout the day is her. But it's not. It sounds like she needs to slow down and realize what she has. Hi im a teen and need help my mom gets mad at me for not starting my "summer reading" for school early we have about 9 days until school starts and about 5 things … low active. You should bring him to a doctor or to a health check. i almost feel envious that your mother took the time to write She gets off when I screw up, then all of a sudden I am hot news. my bro is 26. my mom has no life. I never blamed her but she gave me so little empathy when I had to be in the hospital for plastic surgery for a large scar that resulted and would always tell me "You can't even see it" when I would tell her as a little kid someone made fun of me. are more likely to have girl births than boys . Why you feel the need to conflate them baffles me. Is or was your mother overly conscious of what others think (neighbors, friends, family, co-workers)? I work with many sons raised by narcissistic parents. Narcissistic Personality Disorder is not the same as bipolar disorder. I actually wonder if this could be grounds for a lawsuit. Tell her that she is the thing that makes you happy. I don't know I have the same problem I try my best but my mom and grandmother also say hurtful things that also piss me off but if I had anger problems it would be a disaster but I control my self my mom is Dominican and sometimes when I cry she thinks it's drama but she has no idea how much her words hurt, Omg I am so sorry.i am going through this right now my grandma always yelling at me over small things and me and you matching up about the things we go through and I am sorry for the both of us.i have a bad temper but also a sensitive person.i cry and be mad at the same time.sometimes I be wanna kill my grandma but that's bad to think like that because I be so hurt that I can kill myself and I am crying while writing this because I'm just sad.im sorry you go through all of this but like the people say you will get use to this and I'm still not use to this but i hope you make it through with your mom.and good luck :). I do think that many boys are raised to be a little self-centered and needy through mothers who enjoy babying them and making them dependent. This is why some men have some real trouble in the dating world as they age, and also can't seem to do a load of laundry or clean their home. Based off of what Matt wrote, I would suggest attempting to become more social and begin to do things to want to do. Shoul I feel bad that my friend unfollowed from every social media platforms. I suggest you stop hanging out with LD and Ca-meal. You described my mother and my relationship when I was 20. Well when my mom does that to me I start crying right in frOnt of her to make her feel bad....also if your sitting down get up and say....why do you hate me so much then run to your room...that will give her something to think about and feel bad about...because honestly she deserves it.. I always knew something was not right with them but did not have a name to attach to it and felt guilty or judgemental for thinking something was different. If anyone tries to reel her in there is hell to pay! What Verbal "Tells" May Reveal About Someone's Personality, Deciphering Covert and Grandiose Narcissists, How Narcissists Protect Themselves from Feeling Like Losers, Psychology Today © 2020 Sussex Publishers, LLC, Blaming the Pandemic Could Help Your Relationship, The Surprising Benefits of Blinking on Visual Perception, 3 Ways Shopping Behavior Has Changed During the Pandemic, Find a therapist who understands narcissism, Oh yep yep... other people´s failures are like her life blood, Is Your Partner a Narcissist? This video is unavailable. . i noticed this about myself long ago and never understood why? I never cause trouble but I’m not doing that good in school. I had half a year to go to psychiatrist before she would go to get a lawyer for the divorce.